Mr. Ibis and I met up with friends at a St. Patty's day party in the afternoon and I drowned my sorrows in Harp. Drinking while the sun's still up is always a little strange, but I needed it. The week of Aunt Flo's visit is now the one week per month I allow myself to indulge, and indulge I did. There were so many cute kids at the party... I was trying not to be a weirdo, but I was probably staring just a little. There was one baby girl in a white sweater, green leggings, and tiny little mukluk boots... she was toddling around munching on a hunk of bread, her hair all wispy and white-blond, and her dad doting on her - she was just too adorable for words.
A few school-aged girls at the party got into a dramatic argument, with tears all around, and my friend remarked to me, "See, this is why I'm not having kids. I can't deal with that shit." I replied, "That's how I know I'm so far gone... I look at them and just think awwww." Incidentally, I know my friend is full of it. The real reason he's not having kids is because his partner doesn't want any. At random moments he will admit he has baby fever, but most of the time he just tells himself, and everyone else, that kids are awful and who needs them. I feel for him - that's a hard situation to be in. You find someone who loves you for who you are, who is a kind and loving person and the man you want to spend your life with - but he doesn't share this one thing. How could you just walk away? He couldn't, and I probably couldn't either, truth be told. I want to have children very much, but if Mr. Ibis ever changed his mind, I know deep down in my heart that that would not be a dealbreaker for me, because I need him more than I need a baby.
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