Happy 4th!

We all went to a party last night - gotta love those friends who throw kids-welcome parties! I took Miles to one of their shindigs when he was about 8 weeks old, but at 5 months I was a little nervous about the prospect. We were arriving around 6 pm and I knew that he would need meals & diaper changes - easy enough - and at least one "nap," which was a little more frightening to contemplate. We were also wondering if the Stranger Danger factor that caused a Father's Day meltdown would make a reappearance.

He did pretty well with the strangers, not too happy to be held by anyone but mom and dad but other than that he was fine. He even loosened up enough to smile and talk a little. Mostly he just hung out quietly looking around at everyone all night.

When he got really overtired I tried to put him to sleep on the floor of the quiet master bedroom (at the hosts' invitation) but he just wouldn't settle. So I nursed him and stuck him back in the sling and, luckily, he fell asleep in there for at least a half an hour, maybe more. In the end we made it to around 10pm before he fell apart and had to make a swift exit, but everyone else was leaving by then anyway (another benefit to the kids-welcome party). It broke my heart the way his little lower lip just went into that sad pout, even though I knew he was only super tired.

Someone on the N.est recently tried to claim that having only one kid is like having an "accessory" and doesn't force a lifestyle change that having two does. I find this hilarious. Miles is (usually) really mellow and well behaved when we take him out, but little children just have a LOT of needs, even the quiet ones, and my handbag doesn't start to cry when I keep it out too late. Even the older kids at the party needed parental attention from time to time - getting in squabbles, getting hurt playing ball, whatever. We haven't killed off our social life to spend every minute coddling our kid, but there absolutely is a lifestyle change involved, and anyone who says otherwise is just trying to be macho.

And anyway... what's so bad about a lifestyle change? If someone's not willing to make changes to care for a child, they aren't ready to have a baby. That seems obvious but sometimes I see all this chatter about not making children the center of your world and people lose sight of common sense in an effort to be less baby-crazy than "those people." Let me tell you, there is a trade-off. I traded staying at a party past 10 pm for waking up to an adorable little face happily babbling at me at 7 am. That's a pretty wonderful trade in my book.