Sorry dad

I don't know why but I've always been so afraid to hurt my dad's feelings, I'll go along with almost anything he says to avoid offending him. It's not him, it's me and some weird hangup I obviously haven't figured out yet.

Last night he called to say that he & stepmom were buying us cord blood banking for the baby. They wanted to surprise us but they needed more info and had 10 minutes to take advantage of a big discount. My stepmom had asked me before if we were doing it bc they did it with both their kids. In an attempt to be tactful I just said it was too expensive and we had other priorities... instead of the truth which is that I think it's a waste of money. I didn't want to be all judgy about their choice to do it.

So I tried to get out of it by saying no thank you we had decided against it. But they kept pushing and pushing and pushing. Finally I could do nothing else but just flat out say that I don't want them to spend their money on it, the AAP does not recommend it, and we don't want it. Sorry. I felt terrible. My dad's voice kind of wavered like he did feel hurt... sigh. But then he said that's okay, don't worry about it.

I know this is so stupid but I still feel so guilty. Mr. I told me I would feel worse if I let them spend $1000 on something like that, and he's right. I actually had a dream last night about my dad preparing a lavish feast for a bunch of ungrateful brats who did nothing but complain and reject it - my subconscious is so obvious sometimes.