I had a rather unpleasant night followed by an hour long nap on the couch this morning. Maybe I spent too much time slouched in my office chair yesterday? All I know is that my upper back was brutally painful no matter which sleeping position I tried. Oh well.
I think I have been feeling some pelvic pressure. When the doctor asked me, I didn't think that I had. But yesterday I definitely did... and it's sort of like feeling the baby move, in that once you definitely feel it, you realize you've felt it before and not realized it. I always imagined pelvic pressure to be very painful, because it just sounds like it would be... but either I have a high pain tolerance or the pressure is just not that bad. A lot of what I was thinking of as gas and a mysterious need to poop was probably baby's head bearing down. Yesterday I was out running errands and noticed that it was a bit harder to walk at times, with some fullness, pressure, and mild pain in my pelvis, along with that strange loose-hipped feeling in my legs. I feel heavy weight in the lower quadrants of my belly and the top of my uterus seems quite low - under my ribcage now.
Last night I told Mr. I this and he demanded that I show him my belly in profile. He said he thinks I've dropped, and then proceeded to gasp "Oh my god!" several times, haha.
I suppose I am on maternity leave now, since I haven't gotten any more of the light office work I was doing, and I certainly can't paint anymore. Mr. I "forbade" me to leave the house at all today, because the world is coated in ice and it's expected to freezing rain later on (for my part I try not to worry, or even think, about him driving around all day in this kind of weather). I have an OB appointment tomorrow morning and Mr. I doesn't want me to go, and also suspects it will be canceled, because we're supposed to get another snow storm - I really want to go. Maybe that's dumb, but I like going to the doctor. I could be crazy, but I was kind of looking forward to another internal and finding out if I've continued to progress. Mr. Ibis said he'll drive me if it's not canceled.
I've been trying to use my days off so far to work on my to-do lists, but there's not much left for me to do that I can actually do this week. It's a bad time to call daycares. I'm not too into trying to install the car seat in the freezing cold. My hospital bag is basically packed except for the things I need to throw in at the last minute.
Last night I confessed to Mr. I that sometimes lately I'm having moments where I'm totally freaked out by the idea of having a baby. I like our life together and I'm afraid of losing it. He said that he sometimes feels that way too, but he pointed out that we've kind of just been settled in our little routines for quite a while now and it's probably time to add some excitement. Which is true. And of course I'm excited to have a baby, I feel like I've been waiting for so long now - it's just overwhelming sometimes to think about how much our lives will change!
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