Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

My husband can tell you that I don't always react well to big life changes. Particularly when they involve work and money. I'm having a little bit of a hard time right now with a major life decision - well, I suppose the decision's been made and what I'm having trouble with is the impending upheaval.

Mr. Ibis got a new job. The new job will almost double his paycheck. It will also have him out on the road a lot. He will be doing two or three 30 hour runs a week. Three runs would mean he'd be home Tuesday night, Thursday night, Saturday night, and Sunday. So, one day and three nights at home with us.

I'm pretty sad about this. I feel like we just got our little family started and now he's leaving. I would have been okay with it if it had just been us, but I'm sad for Mr. I that he's going to miss a lot of Miles's babyhood, I'm sad for Miles that his dad won't be here, and I'm sad for me that I'm going to be doing the lion's share of the parenting. I'm picturing eating dinner alone three nights a week, putting Miles to bed alone, doing all the housework by myself. I'm afraid we'll argue, and never have time to do anything fun.

But it would be foolish to turn down an opportunity to get ahead financially, finally. We have debts we really need to pay off (or even down would be nice). We would like to be able to take vacations. Hell, we would like to be able to think about things like car repairs or household repairs without having panic attacks. It would take the pressure off of me to have a ton of work all the time, and it would free me up to spend more time with Miles.

And yet, it is sad. Mr. Ibis and I are each other's best friends and we spend a lot of time together - pretty much all our free time. Of which there will be considerably less now. And I have already been worried about how well Mr. I and the kid are bonding, now they will have less time to do so. I'm scared. I just hope we can do this.