The bad news is: Mr. Ibis's job is changing. We're not 100% clear on the details or the shape of things yet, but his employer's government contract got switched up. It looks like Mr. I might be going over the road for four straight days a week, followed by three days off per week. Which may or may not entail a slight pay cut as well if it means fewer hours.
I feel like I can handle four days, that I've been eased into it by flying solo every other day. But Mr. I is understandably upset. One might even say grieving a little. The thing is, he's really been enjoying spending so much time with us. On weeks when I worked he was home alone with Miles two or three days a week, and on weeks when I didn't work or only worked a few hours, he was home with both us for four or occasionally even five days a week. Hardly a day went by when one of us didn't remark aloud on how lucky we were. But some things, I guess, really are too good to be true. And he's pretty bummed out. Yesterday the three of us were just hanging out in bed in the afternoon and as we were playing audience to Miles's enthusiastic gurgling I saw a look come over Mr. I's face that was so sad it broke my heart a little.
In true Master of Denial style I am still holding out hope that Mr. I can keep his old schedule. Until we know for sure what's happening I'm just kind of not thinking about it too much.
Meanwhile, I'm getting concerned about daycare Judy. And I know, we loved her so much at first. But lately these little tiny red flags have been popping up, and now with the imminent possibility of needing her more than two days a week, I'm getting concerned.
First she told us she was getting a dog. I love dogs, we have a dog, I'm fine with Miles being around dogs... but I did worry a little the addition of a new, unknown dog. It's a German Shepherd that her friend is rehoming. She doesn't know why it's being rehomed. It's a Katrina rescue, which to me says its background is unknown. A big adult dog. There is a chance that it will all be fine but also many things that could go wrong, obviously. She said that it wouldn't be allowed in the baby room, and the only time the kids would ever be around the dog is in the backyard. I guess the other parents were primarily worried about dog hair. I don't give a crap about dog hair, I am concerned about safety. I don't have any idea whether Judy knows how to manage this situation because she doesn't have a dog now. So that worries me.
Then a 10 year old girl started coming to daycare to "help out," I think Judy's cousin or niece or something. I can't remember how long she's going to be there. By itself that's not a problem but since she's been there the TV's been on every time I come by. Yesterday when I picked up Miles he was staring at the TV while they waited for me... is 10 minutes of TV going to rot his brain? No. But if he starts having to go 4-5 days a week, I'm not going to like him watching TV every day.
Red flag #3, on Monday when I picked Miles up he was sleeping in a bouncy chair and there was a blanket over his head. I'm standing in the doorway and Judy is there, the niece/cousin is there, and a preschool aged nephew is there, everyone is standing there and I'm like, my baby has a blanket over his head and NO ONE is reacting. Am I crazy or is that weird? All I could do was stand there waiting to see if anyone mentioned it in any way. Finally Judy says, "Oh, yeah, does he do that for you? At first he pushes the blanket away and then he pulls it over his head." I was just like, "Uh... no." I mean, he was fine and it was just a light receiving blanket, but really... isn't that odd?
And finally, yesterday I picked him up and Judy said he had a great day, but mentioned that after his first bottle she tried to lay him down for 15 minutes to digest and he threw a fit until she put him in the jumperoo - that he gets so angry anytime he's not in there. The more I thought about this the more I started to wonder, is he in there all day except when he's eating or napping? Just because he loves it doesn't mean that four or five hours of jumping is okay... I think that is a little much for his body at 5 months.
So help me out here readers, are these real red flags or just me being overanxious? Should I ask her about these things or just take a wait and see approach for now? (I did ask about the dog but she doesn't know much yet... so that's ongoing.)
5 comments:
I say red flags - trust your gut, you know your baby. Good luck to you, I know this must be stressful.
Red flags. If those things happened to Jack, I would be concerned. The jumperoo thing bothers me the most. I really hope he gets a lot of snuggle time during the day and isn't just in the jumperoo.
Red flags for sure. Like anonymous said - trust your gut. You will never feel comfortable going to work until you feel comfortable with your daycare.
I know in home daycares are great for personal attention, but I love our daycare center SO much. And they are big sticklers for the rules and making sure safety is first but my DS gets lots of snuggles, kisses, and interaction.
R - I visited a great daycare center but their rigid pay schedules won't work for us. I sometimes have weeks off at a time and don't want to pay for a full (even PT) week when I'm not working. It's hard to find people who are willing to work with my unpredictable work schedule.
Thanks for your thoughts everyone...
The TV and jumperoo things would really bother me. We're right at the point where our daycare lady has asked if we've used an exersaucer yet (we don't even have one) so she can have another place to put Annie during the day. I guess I would just ask that he be faced away from the TV, and get plenty of floor time to practice rolling and movement. I know there are certain things you just have to accept will be not perfect with some in home daycares (esp ones that are flexible) but you can at least ask, it'll probably make you feel better.
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